what i wanted to write about on Wednesday

the past two days have been unexpected.

my boyfriend's younger brother came to stay with us. he had called us last week, as he was going to be in town for a physical endurance test (pre-military training) and wanted to know if he could meet us for dinner. of course it was okay, and i was more than happy to host someone that i consider family myself. so much so- that when he said he was leaving for boot camp in a week i actually teared up.

those that know me, know that i'm definately not a huge fan of the armed forces. to be completely honest- i consider war defense a necessary evil. and although i'm often prone to have the same movie interests of a 12 year old boy at times, and always rejoice when they kill the 'bad guy', in real life i feel that it's very different. and i don't judge his brother for joining the Navy, but i'm having a hard time with the whole concept. not only am i afraid of him getting hurt or killed in the long run- especially since he eventually wants to become a navy seal- but i'm afraid of him changing.

as much as i hate stereotypes, i have to admit they were created because most often they hold true. this boy is not your typical 'military man'. he's had long shaggy hair for as long as i've known him. he giggles more often than he speaks. he's very quiet and non-abrasive. he wouldn't even spit out his opinion when we were picking out a movie to rent at blockbuster.

so not only do i worry about his safety (as any true female, quasi older-sibling would), but it just doesn't make sense to me. it makes sense that he wants to get away from home, and start a venture of his own. it makes sense that he doesn't want to go to the same college as his two oldest siblings, or become a mechanic like his dad, and brother he's been living with in small town Iowa for the summer.

needless to say- its hard being supportive. but of course- i didn't act this way. i asked questions, perhaps too many, but i figure most of the time when people disagree with things its because they don't understand them. and i don't want to be an ignorant hater. seeing him in person for a couple days at least reassured me that he didn't want to up and leave his friends and family just for the sake of 'getting away from it all'. this is something he really wants to do and who am i to stand in his way?

so i will be a good non-sister. i will send him carepackages and a card for christmas. i will try not to worry.

and for what its worth- it made me really happy that my boyfriend could spend some quality time with his younger brother before he left. i want my house to be a welcoming one. even if its on a week night!