letter to my sister, upon her college graduation

My dear Sister,

I think we both know the meaning of the phrase "walking in someone else's shoes," both literally and otherwise. I- like you- have a gift for being empathetic, compassionate, and just generally wanting to understand how someone else is feeling. I love that about you, about us, and our family in general.

God knows we've both had our hellish times, sometimes together, sometimes even towards each other, and sometimes at very different times and places. Like those infamous term papers we never thought we'd finish, or that graduation we never thought would come. And yet, here it is. There were some days in college where I didn't think I would make it through that class, or that final, but I did. And you have too. And one day you will look back at these past 5 years and not remember how hard it was. But knowing we could make it through those times, I know we can make it through today, tomorrow and the next day, no matter what life throws at us. Sometimes it may seem easier to relate to one another when we're experiencing some of the same things at the same times; like new relationships, family problems, job crisis, etc. But even if we're too busy to see each other in person, or even talk on the phone, I know you're somewhere out there and totally get me.

There are days when I want to talk to someone and I think to myself, Rachael would understand. There are other times we are on the phone and I am continously suprised that we have so much in common. Maybe this was always the case, and I just never realized it. Of course, in a lot of ways you & I are like night & day, but just like evening and morning, we both share the same world, the same passions.

It must be harder in some ways to grow up as the younger sister; I'm sure you've been told a time or two, "Oh you remind me of Sarah," or "Hey, thats what Sarah did too," and I'm sure it can be annoying. The funny thing is, I haven't always felt like the best role model, sometimes I don't want you to look up to me. And upon your college graduation, in some ways I feel I have failed myself, and you. I haven't acheived certain things I've wanted to by this time in my life, I'm not even using my college degree at the moment. And I don't want that to be the case for you, but I don't even think it will be. You've already done so much, and you don't even have your diploma yet! And in a lot of ways I look up to you, Rachael. In some aspects, you act like the older sister.

Even growing up, when I was all boy-crazy and hanging out with friends, you were getting good grades and making 4-H projects. But it was still nice to know I could walk across the hall and come bother you in your bedroom. Some of my favorite childhood memories with you involve playing dress-up; somehow, I always was the 'princess' and you always were the 'peasant'. And as silly as it all may seem now, I don't want you to live your life just to make everyone else happy. Because you are a princess too-you deserve the best! You are so beautiful and intelligent- you have the world ahead of you. I know that may be a bit cliche, but its true. I only and ever want the best for you, I want you to be happy every day of your life.

I've seen so many good changes in you as you've gotten older, and if I'm to blame for some of them, well then I suppose I'll take that credit. Never forget to be true to yourself, and make yourself happy first. Because if you are full of joy, then the people around you will be too. I've learned this from experience, as I'm sure you have too.

And lastly, I want to say thank you, my dear sister. Thank you for all the times we sang and played piano together. Thank you for sharing crab rangoons and watching shows on IPTV with me. Thank you for always listening. Thank you for once being scared of thunderstorms and spiders. Thank you for letting me win at board games. Thank you for yelling at me at times when I needed it. Thank you for letting me entertain your friends in high school and crashing your birthday parties. Thank you for liking frogs and Barbie dolls. Thank you for being silly with me. Thank you for the Sunday night talks. Thank you for asking me to borrow my green shoes. Thank you for being flexible when I don't know what to do.

I love you Rachael. Thanks for loving me and being my sister. I know it must be a lot of work sometimes, but I want you to know how much I appreciate you, and how proud I am of you for finishing what you started 5 years ago....you are truly amazing, my little sister. Truly amazing.