without further ado...

i have officially decided- drum roll please- to see a therapist.

i don't know when this will happen, and i don't know yet how i will pay for it, but it's time. here are some reasons why:

1) i can't be a psych major, and someone who eventually might work (again) in a type of counseling career, who believes that therapy is good and healthy, without trying it at least once myself.

2) i've had a couple friends who've seen a therapist and had a positive experience.

3) i'm sick of trying to deal with my "problems" all by myself, and other relationships suffering as a side effect.

4) i shouldn't have to deal with my "problems" all by myself.


now i realize, reason number 4 might seem a little self-indulgent and utopian in thought, but there's a difference between simply giving up, and realizing one's need of a professional's opinion, objective advice, etc.

i realize no one is perfect, and no one has a perfect family. but after a weekend of what was another reality shock with mine, i've realized once more that these things should not happen, especially when i am not involved by choice, and end up suffering just the same.

so maybe in regards to my previous post, seeing a therapist will help me better analyze and mold the icky things in my life into managable details. except of course, the one where I'm "sick of being poor".

we'll see what happens. i'm kind of excited, kind of nervous. but mostly just ready. really, very ready. and praying that whomever i see will accept payment plans ;)